Fuck Ambition

Everyone seems like they're letting life pass them by nowadays. They're working stupid amounts of hours, and going to school into their 30s and 40s. It's ridiculous. Nobody really has time to enjoy life or have a serious relationship anymore. Everyone puts love on the back burner, and it pisses me off. Why does everyone think they need a goddamn Masters in everything now!? I don't care how many fucking degrees you have. It's a fucking job. It's what you do to pay the bills. If you're doing it more than 40 hours a week and have no social life, you're doing it wrong. I'll be 40 next year, and I've been alone most of my life. I don't want to be someone's weekend play thing. I want someone with actual free time.

Do I sound insane? "What if I told you insane was working fifty hours a week in some office for fifty years at the end of which they tell you to piss off; ending up in some retirement village hoping to die before suffering the indignity of not being able to make it to the toilet in time? Wouldn't you consider that to be insane?" ~Steve Buscemi (Con Air)

"Now tell me which ones are free. Free from debt. Anxiety. Stress. Fear. Failure. Indignity. Betrayal. How many wish that they were born knowing what they know now? Ask yourself how many would do things the same way over again? And how many would live their lives like me." ~Jack Reacher

Fuck 2020 - July Edition

Fuck all these paranoid people that are hiding at home and demanding more lockdowns. Fuck all the old people. If they'd fuck off and die in a timely manner nursing homes wouldn't need to exist. Those places are essentially death row for retirees, but you hear people whining those places need more test kits. Fuck em. They'll be dead soon either way. Stop clogging up the fucking labs. There's no cure. Testing isn't even that fucking important. If you're sick, isolate yourself at home until you're either better or dead. Simple.

Every country has the virus. It's not going anywhere. We're not getting rid of it until there's a vaccine or it burns itself out like the flu. Every time we open more things, the case numbers go up. So fucking what? If you want to hide at home, be my guest. Closing all the borders is fucking dumb. People in your country have it. People in my country have it. Wear a fucking mask. Nobody in their right mind is going to quarantine for 2 full weeks without symptoms. All they're doing with this shit is completely ruining the mental health of the world. Everyone's a prisoner in their home and the push back against lockdowns will keep growing. They had their chance with lockdowns, couldn't do it in a way that actually eliminated the virus, and scientists aren't coming up with a goddamn vaccine/cure nearly fast enough. Now fuck off and let everyone live.

Some positive things are happening in 2020 besides test results. Can't wait to see which countries end up in Guinness for the most cases, deaths, etc.

Gamestop will probably die sooner

Movie Theaters might die, which means more studios finally moving on to releasing streaming/disc day one instead of making us wait 6 months.

Everyone is finally demanding mail-in ballots to make it easier to vote without lining up somewhere like cattle. It's the 21st century. The fact we have online banking and all this other shit but people can't simply place their vote online is ridiculous and just shows how corrupt and technophobic all the ancient fucks who run this country are.

Maybe a few less politicians

Less old people

Less homeless

Less inmates

Oil industry took a huge hit. Fuck them.

A lot of people learned to make shitty masks. Why the fuck are so few people/companies making the kind you can tie on instead of the elastic shit that rips your fucking ears off!?

Hating China isn't nearly as racist anymore.

Protesters out blocking roads will likely get sick, so there's punishment even if the fucking cops won't arrest them.

Might get my inheritance sooner

Fuck Em If They Can't Take a Joke

Everyone is too fucking sensitive and everything is discrimination or bigotry nowadays. You can't take away peoples' right to be assholes. Some Starbucks barista is apparently in a world of shit over writing something on a Muslim woman's cup. There's a difference between discrimination and simply mocking people for following ancient superstition. She got what she fucking ordered, didn't she? Discrimination would be refusing to serve her. If they don't want labeled and mocked for their stupid shit, they should stop wearing head coverings and shit in the US. No different than labeling a cup "Pig" for a cop. You just know people are labeling cups for chicks with that ugly short haircut "Karen" knowing full well the bitch will have a meltdown over it. Gotta get some entertainment in your day, right? People come to this country to get away from theirs but don't really want to get away from their own backwards shit, nor do they have any respect for this country if they won't even learn our language properly. Then they wonder why they get mocked and treated differently.

Do we protect the idiots who have 50 piercings or tattoo ink on 80% of their body when they get turned down for jobs and people look at them funny for being different? NO. This should be no different. It's not about a color or specific faith. It's about people sticking out like a nun in a room full of hookers. It's about the assclowns who go on planes and refuse to sit next to a woman because they might get horny. The assholes that go door to door and try to convert you to their ridiculous beliefs. The assholes that wear stupid shit on their heads. The assholes who get jobs near alcohol and refuse to serve it. The assholes who get jobs at pharmacies and refuse to give women birth control. 

Ever hear the old expression, "Sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me?" People need thicker skin. I'm not racist. I hate everyone. I hate religious people because they believe all their superstitious shit and demand everyone follow their doctrine or go to hell. I hate Atheists because they're pro-gun control. I hate Amish because of HOW they live and get in everyone's way with horses and buggies just as much as their lame ass religion. I hate ALL politicians. I hate people who think voting actually matters. I hate people who don't speak English properly. I also hate the word "barista," come to think of it. I hate people who wear funny hats and expect special treatment. I can't wear a cap for my driver's license photo, so take off the fucking hijab or you're not getting a driver's license. I don't care where your from or what you believe. That's what equality is all about. Same rules apply to everyone. Fuck you, your culture, and your beliefs. 

Most people who come from that region, whether it be middle east, India, or Philippines, typically have thick fucking accents and don't learn to speak English properly or clearly no matter how long they're here. Every fucking doctor you go to now is some foreigner, who spent 10 years in medical school, and you still can't fucking understand them cause they're too fucking lazy to learn the language. It was bad enough when we couldn't read doctors' writing. A friend of mine told me about a German student at his college that showed up not knowing a word of English but was speaking it perfectly within 3 months. Hell, half the blacks in this country barely speak the fucking language! The word is "ASK," NOT "AXE" idiots! I say "black" because it's a fucking color and I'm too lazy to write out the more politically correct term. Just as I consider myself WHITE, not fucking caucasian. Whoever came up with that word was a stupid cocksucker.

Fuck Cruises

I kind of like cruises, but everything has negatives. First and foremost the fucking muster drills. Every fucking cruise is the same shit. No matter how many you go on, you can't skip any of it. Oh, "it's for safety." No, it's a circle jerk to comply with international law and cover the cruise line's asses legally. It CAN be made easier. They already have everyone meeting indoors instead of at the actual lifeboats. They could easily let us check in at our respective stations, send us back to our rooms, and play the fucking safety briefing on the TVs. It's technically no different than doing it with us sitting in the goddamn theater together. Legally, they could totally do it. The law only says what we have to be briefed on during the drill, not HOW or WHERE. Hence being able to brief us in the fucking theater on my last cruise. The worst thing about the drill isn't even the briefing itself. It's waiting around for the assholes to start the fucking briefing. For whatever reason it always takes them ages to fucking start. If it's on TV, we can be unpacking and settling in. Win-win.

I don't like Caribbean cruises anymore because the cruise lines insist on including their bullshit private island on all the itineraries. I don't want to waste a day on an empty island. I'm not a beach person, and I don't swim. Fuck that shit. Every island we stop at has a fucking beach. Why bore the fuck out of the people who aren't interested in roasting their balls off on the beach? And where the hell is the logic in running people through the metal detectors when we get back on board from the cruise line's own island? Where the hell would I find a fucking weapon? Am I going to buy one from a fucking dolphin? For fuck sake!

Nearly everything shuts down by 10pm on cruises. WHY? I'd like a fucking hot tub after the old people and kids go to bed. Let the younger couples fucking enjoy their evening. The lack of food at night is also annoying as shit. They used to have midnight buffets and 24hr ice cream, etc. Now it's "Fuck you. Go to bed." Thanks, assholes.

Then when your cruise is over, you get to fill out a lovely customs declaration because nobody's allowed to buy anything without paying American sales tax. Fuck you. Can anyone prove I bought a hat or watch from some street vendor in some foreign country? I fucking doubt it. All the more reason to use cash on vacation.

Fuck Animals Too

People who have dogs without their own goddamn yard to shit in, OR worse, the ones who do and STILL walk them around town are fucking assholes. Litter train the fucking things or something. They have no business walking around town pissing and shitting on things in the first place. At least homeless people have a fucking reason to do it! Get a fucking cat or something if you don't have a yard, especially if you're going to pick one of those yappy little fucking dogs anyway. Some of those ugly, yappy little fucking breeds really need to die out. What is with people always picking the ugliest, most annoying pets?

Then you have the assclowns that work 7 days a week and never see the fucking dog anyway. If your neighbors or someone else has to feed/walk your pet on a regular basis, you probably shouldn't have one. Nobody cares if you're lonely. Work less and find someone to date. People keeping dogs strictly outside is bullshit too. I don't care if the stray cats are having an orgy. Keep that fucking hillbilly doorbell quiet. Birds and fish are also ridiculous pets. Birds are fucking nasty and fish just swim around and look pretty. When are emotional support skunks and badgers going to catch on? That'll help with social distancing.

Fuck animal racing as well. It's archaic and fucking stupid. Fuck dog shows. Fuck the goofy owners and their poofy fucking pets. More importantly, fuck the assholes who think it's worth televising. Fuck the ones who show horses. The only horse show I might care to watch would be something X rated. Most importantly, fuck the assclowns who put ridiculous values on all these dumb animals and the even dumber motherfuckers who pay the extortionate prices.

Quit whining about things going extinct. It'd be nice if more annoying creatures went extinct first, like politicians, but shit happens. Natural selection, progress, whatever. I don't give a fuck if koalas only exist in zoos soon, no matter how goddamn cute they are. Pandas were cute too, and they've been near fucked for quite a while. Deal with it. If we can't eat it or fuck it, it's not that important in the grand scheme of things.

Speaking of which, do poachers eat rhino or elephant meat? Seems like a waste of a fuckton of meat just for the ivory. Wonder what it tastes like. One of those poor African countries needs to grow some balls and turn poacher punishment into profits. Setup a nice preserve and dump unarmed poachers in with different nasty animals every week. Put it on TV or stream it. People can bet on which assholes will die first or from what (snake bite, lion, quick sand). They could have some fun with that shit, and seriously deter poaching. Win-win.

p.s. Fuck those World Wildlife Fuckwits for making the wrestling company change its name.

Fuck Elections - 2020 Edition

I'm 38. I don't vote. I'm not registered, and I don't give a fuck. People who put out signs and bumper stickers are fucking idiots. Every fucking time people think shit is going to change or be different. The fact people think anyone, especially another ancient old fuck who's been in politics for 50 years already, will actually do anything really good is just sickening. The 2 party system is garbage, and the candidates will always be garbage. Doesn't matter who's in the big white house. Doesn't matter who's running state and local shit. They're all the same stupid rich fucks who pretend to know everything but really just do shit to benefit their country club buddies. It's all the same circle jerk, and the same old fucks that are a generation behind. Then people wonder why nothing changes. Oh, can we still call it "white house" or is that racist now???

You choose between some superstitious GOP lunatic who will protect the 2nd amendment but gives handouts and tax breaks to corporations, and has an administration full of religious zealots that push xtian agendas over science and neutrality...
 
OR a socialist fuck who wants to ban guns and throw money at everything instead of actually fixing it in more complex ways. Look how fucking shitty Obamacare was. It didn't solve shit. Neither will Medicare for all. Medicare is still essentially a fucking insurance company. They still have way more control over what treatments, tests, etc you can have than they fucking should. I shouldn't need to have teeth pulled because I won't pay $600 for a fucking root canal. An abscess is an infection, and saving the goddamn tooth should be covered. Make healthcare NON-profit and cap all the drug costs, fund hospitals directly etc.

Same with college. Stop letting kids that can't even get a goddamn credit card run up thousands in debt for a convoluted education that has you spending way more time learning useless shit than actually learning the job skills for what you're intending to do. NO, our tax dollars should NOT be pissed away letting everyone sit in bullshit classes for years on end. Doctors and nurses, I'd be ok with, NOT some assclown getting a philosophy degree or other more obscure shit. Basic teaching degrees should be free, but not that grad school bullshit that nobody really needs.

Moreover, colleges should have to be about education, NOT their fucking football and basketball. Let the clowns who only care about sports go pro or fuck off and pick a real job to learn. For that matter, lets tax sports more to pay for some of the shit the country actually needs. We also need to quit sending money overseas constantly. Fuck Israel and that whole region. Nothing is ever changing. Spend American money on America.

What other issues are on the plate now? Police reform? Yeah, sure. How bout first we stop wasting money on hooker stings and the bullshit "war on drugs." For all we've spent trying to get rid of drugs, the feds might as well just be buying them to keep supply low. The only thing drug laws are doing is keeping prisons overcrowded. Stupid fucks. If people want drugs, they'll get them. Deal with it. Prohibition doesn't fucking work. This is also something the gun phobic demofuckstick party needs to learn as well.

There's also the fact nobody is fixing the internet infrastructure problem in this country. How many times has Verizon etc been handed fed money to improve rural internet? FCC ruled like 5 years ago that the minimum for broadband is 25mb down. Yet, I'm still stuck with fucking 3. These fuckers aren't doing dick for rural customers, but they keep taking handouts and making promises while never being forced to answer for it.

I've always enjoyed George Carlin's take on voting. 'They say, “If you don’t vote, you have no right to complain”, but where’s the logic in that? If you vote, and you elect dishonest, incompetent politicians, and they get into office and screw everything up, you are responsible for what they have done. You voted them in. You caused the problem. You have no right to complain. I, on the other hand, who did not vote — who did not even leave the house on Election Day — am in no way responsible for what these politicians have done and have every right to complain about the mess that you created. That I didn’t have anything to do with. So when you’re having one of those swell elections that you like so much…on that day I will be doing essentially the same as you…the only difference is when I get done masturbating I’ll have a little something to show for it.' ~George Carlin

p.s. If anyone's pissed we still don't have a woman president, trying picking a candidate that we can actually jerk off to instead of a crusty old bitch. Might pull in a few more votes.

Fuck Hollywood

I'm glad the theaters are fucked right now. Netflix makes movies like Polar without them. That alone proves they're not necessary anymore. Home theaters are big. Streaming is big. Plenty of people are tired of going to theaters just because it's the only place you can see this movie or that one for the first 6 months. If they can't survive without that exclusivity (fucking monopoly), they don't deserve to. Fuck them, their overpriced concessions, and their fucking edited versions of movies. Every movie should go streaming and disc release day one with the goddamn director's/extended/unrated cut. That's another reason I avoid theaters. Everything gets a better, longer cut on disc.

People complain that Hollywood isn't being original anymore either. It's all remakes and sequels. Some of them are ok. What I want to know is why they can't even come up with original titles!? There are so many movies that share the same fucking title but have nothing to do with each other. It's fucking annoying.

Here's another bullshit thing. All the useless advertising at the beginning of the movie. I'm not even talking about previews. I'm talking about the ridiculous amount of studio and company logos on every fucking movie now. It used to be just Fox, or Universal, etc. Now there's like 12 different studios involved with every movie! FUCK OFF! Nobody gives a fuck which studios were involved in making the goddamn movie. Just let us fucking watch it! Who the fuck are you advertising to, cunts!? Put it in the end credits so we can ignore it easier just like all the cast and crew shit. Those loud fucking Dolby/THX intros can fuck off and die too.

The way some of these movies tell their story is fucking stupid too. I'm sorry, but I can't stand movies like Reservoir Dogs and others that can't tell a coherent fucking story from start to finish in chronological fucking order. How fucking hard is that? Why jump around in the time line!? Does the fucking producer have ADHD for fuck sake?! So many movies that could've been good are absolutely ruined by that bullshit.

Fuck the old directors/producers that have entirely too much control over their movies too. Anyone wondering why Abyss hasn't gotten a BD/UHD release? Last year was the 30th anniversary, and it went completely ignored because the studio can't fucking release it without James Cameron approving the transfer, and that cunt can't be bothered to watch his own fucking movie or sign off on it. Fuck Richard Donner too. Lethal Weapon 1-3 had extended cuts on DVD, but we'll never get those on BD because that dickfaced fuck didn't like them and demanded the studio not release them that way again. I happen to love that playground scene being added to the first movie, which Murtaugh fucking talks about in both cuts.

p.s. Fuck Netflix for not releasing their movies on disc.

Fuck "Boots on the Ground"

It's the 21st century. We don't need boots on the ground. Bomb them into next week or send in black ops to deal with certain assholes quietly. We have all this technology and people still want to waste American lives on foreign soil for no fucking reason. How many were wasted being used to police Iraq over the years while some rich cunt got richer from rebuilding? Fuck that shit. How many of our people are stationed all over the fucking world for no real purpose? Bullshit.

We don't need to control foreign soil. Fuck the 1% and their oil concerns which have been the reason for most of the conflicts the past 30 fucking years. If there wasn't oil in the middle east, it would probably glow in the fucking dark by now. Fuck that entire region. Stop sending our fucking money over there. They send billions of fucking dollars to these other countries every year, leave our internet infrastructure, roads, etc in shambles in this country, then wonder why nobody wants to fucking work. How bout we start taking care of this fucking country?

I like Steven Seagal's quote in Marked For Death: "The way l look at it, you come home, mind your own business, watch your own yard. And then, if trouble finds you, you go after it and you bite its head off..."

Fuck Weddings

If you're gonna get married, get fucking married and be done with it. I also can't stand hearing the word "fiance." This isn't fucking France. You shouldn't be engaged long enough to get used to calling each other that lame ass word anyway. People spend entirely too much time planning life and not enough time actually fucking living it. 

Weddings are fucking stupid. Spend a year or more planning an expensive family reunion with a bullshit religious ceremony attached just to put on a show for a bunch of people that don't fucking matter and mostly don't bother visiting any other time. Go get married in private and spend the money on an awesome fucking honeymoon. 

I still don't get the point of the whole thing. Everybody wants that special wedding day. They spend months, or even years, planning it. Here's the amazing part... After all that planning (and all that money), they do the same fucking thing everybody else does! Why bother? Why not at least be a little creative for fuck sake!? Church, flowers, overpriced cake, overpriced white dress, tux, party afterwards, and the goddamn chicken dance. I mean come on. Some of these movie stars and musicians might be fuckin nuts, but at least their weddings are original.

Fucking Earth Defense Force 5 Review

I've played and completed every EDF game on multiple platforms/regions. As much as I love them, some things piss me off, especially KevinEDF asking for nerfs. Fuck off, idiot. Some of us play every mission 100s of times helping people and enjoy the faster, more powerful weapons. Some of us are still really pissed we can't unlock the Genocide Gun in 4.1 without modding. Some of us actually help other people instead of streaming in private rooms and whining about how we think the game should be all the time you inbred cunt!
I wish there was an extra difficulty level that made ALL enemies mutant like Wing Diver the Shooter has. I love the sped up classes and level 100+ weapons in DLC. They should've given us DLC for the English release day one. What the fuck are you delaying it for!? DLC is supposed to be for the most hardcore players that finish the game right away and want more, NOT the fucking casuals that actually take 3 months to finish the main game! The DLC was literally built into the English release on both PS4 and Steam but the cunts waited to sell the unlocks. The devs are also racist cunts for always keeping the Japanese version of the game separate from the rest of the world on their own online servers. Add fucking language packs and stop doing a separate segregated release for the rest of the world. Xenophobic bastards.

Other things that piss me off:
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Scripted Missions
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Why the fuck are you making us wait for NPCs, events etc? You know how many times we have to play each mission for 100%, especially online. Yet, there's no option to bypass this shit and just kill bugs!?!?
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Retarius Webs Clipping Through Walls
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Are you fucking kidding me? All these games later and this shit still happens? It's a cheap fucking way to die.
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Weapon Upgrades
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A neat idea, but horribly executed. I don't want my weapons locked behind multiple levels of RNG. If merely finding extra copies of the same weapons leveled it up, I wouldn't really complain, but having to be lucky enough to drop the weapon AND have the stat you need be higher level than your copy is fucking stupid.